Saturday, October 29, 2005
Trick or Treat!
1. Man, I wish I'd had one of these when I was little. While the other girls on the block were playing house, I could've been playing Rosemary's Baby. (Yeah, I was a weird kid.)
2. I saw an article recently on underwater pumpkin carving. And then I Googled the phrase -- jeez, these events are sprouting up everywhere!
3. And speaking of pumpkin carving... this site's been around a while, but it's always entertaining.
4. My favorite Halloween goodie... It was eight years ago on Halloween that I picked up these two special treats from San Antonio's Animal Defense League. Happy anniversary, kiddos!:
2. I saw an article recently on underwater pumpkin carving. And then I Googled the phrase -- jeez, these events are sprouting up everywhere!
3. And speaking of pumpkin carving... this site's been around a while, but it's always entertaining.
4. My favorite Halloween goodie... It was eight years ago on Halloween that I picked up these two special treats from San Antonio's Animal Defense League. Happy anniversary, kiddos!:
Friday, October 21, 2005
Ocean View
We get a lot of "junk faxes" at work, but one that came in today is a real keeper (comments in italics are mine. What ARE these people thinking?):
EMERGENCY CLEARANCE
HURRICANE WILMA
All Corporate Employees:
Enjoy some of the finest ALL-INCLUSIVE RESORTS in Cancun, Mexico at a $2500 savings due to cancellations from HURRICANE WILMA. Don't miss your chance to save on your next vacation - book today!
Included:
EMERGENCY CLEARANCE
HURRICANE WILMA
All Corporate Employees:
Enjoy some of the finest ALL-INCLUSIVE RESORTS in Cancun, Mexico at a $2500 savings due to cancellations from HURRICANE WILMA. Don't miss your chance to save on your next vacation - book today!
Included:
- 4-Star Ocean Front accommodations (Your hotel may be 5 miles from the shore, but it'll be "ocean front" soon enough)
- All meals (a la carte & buffet) (and MREs)
- Snacks and drinks (incl. alcohol) (Alcohol? GOOD- you'll need it!)
- Land/Water Sports (body surfing?)
- Complimentary bonus trip (is THAT what they're calling evacuations these days?)
Call Now! LIMITED TIME ONLY!! $329 per person
Friday, October 14, 2005
Diversions
Just clearing out a few minor amusements...
1. I get a lot of catalogs. The little gem in the photo was in one of them. I don't know what I like best... the name "splatter lungs," the idea that they're marketed as a stocking stuffer, or the phrase, "frosty purple lungs." C'mon, say it -- it's fun!
2. Sentences that will never make it in a Berlitz course.
3. I think these may be the grown-up version of those little green army men. Tie 'em to firecrackers, set 'em on the barbecue grill, dunk 'em in honey and put them on an ant mound. They're a great little stress reliever from life in the cube farm.
4. Check out the "Who's Who Character Profiles" at Soap Central. Deliciously trashy reading, they're complete biographies of every soap character, including those who haven't been on a show in decades. A real treat for those of us who entered the General Hospital college dorm pools for what would happen to the Luke-Laura-Scotty triangle or the Rick-Monica-Jeff-Leslie-Alan-dearGodisitSTILLgoingon? prism.
5. Lots of fun stuff from the age of civil defense. I lust after the Atomic Platter collection, but not for $195.
6. This made me laugh out loud: an inner view of your favorite cartoon characters. Tweety looks evil.
7. If you don't move your mouse, it's kinda like a lava lamp; if you do move your mouse over him, try not to laugh maniacally: Dubya in freefall.
Enjoy!
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Just give me the @?*#!! drugs...
Got a prescription today to take care of an inflamed ligament, a souvenir from my trip to Austin a couple weeks ago.
The doctor was great. Of course, any doctor who recommends I find a studly guy to give me daily foot massages gets an A. (She'd get an A+ if she actually supplied the guy.) She did lose a few points, however, by suggesting I wear athletic shoes all the time. Sorry, no – I spent my entire childhood in corrective shoes, and -- as God is my witness -- I’ll never wear clodhoppers again.
The pharmacist was another story.
Me: Hello. Yes, I need to know if this medication is gluten-free.
Pinch-faced Pharmacist (PFP): But we’d have to look it up.
Me: That’s correct. Your office has done that before.
PFP: But we’d have to look it UP.
Me: Yes...?
PFP: But we may even have to call the the manufacturer.
Me: That’s fine. But I have to know if it’s gluten-free. If it’s not, my doctor needs to prescribe something else.
PFP (slight whine to voice): But we’d have to LOOK IT UP or CALL SOMEONE.
Me (smiling sweetly, but speaking through clenched teeth): Let me put it this way. If you don’t look it up and I get sick, I will have no choice but to drag my ailing body over here and throw up all over your nice white lab coat. And my lawyer will be taking pictures of the entire tableau. Do we understand each other?
PFP: Um... um... YES, ma’am. Is after 5 OK?
Me: Yes, thank you. Have a nice day!
The doctor was great. Of course, any doctor who recommends I find a studly guy to give me daily foot massages gets an A. (She'd get an A+ if she actually supplied the guy.) She did lose a few points, however, by suggesting I wear athletic shoes all the time. Sorry, no – I spent my entire childhood in corrective shoes, and -- as God is my witness -- I’ll never wear clodhoppers again.
The pharmacist was another story.
Me: Hello. Yes, I need to know if this medication is gluten-free.
Pinch-faced Pharmacist (PFP): But we’d have to look it up.
Me: That’s correct. Your office has done that before.
PFP: But we’d have to look it UP.
Me: Yes...?
PFP: But we may even have to call the the manufacturer.
Me: That’s fine. But I have to know if it’s gluten-free. If it’s not, my doctor needs to prescribe something else.
PFP (slight whine to voice): But we’d have to LOOK IT UP or CALL SOMEONE.
Me (smiling sweetly, but speaking through clenched teeth): Let me put it this way. If you don’t look it up and I get sick, I will have no choice but to drag my ailing body over here and throw up all over your nice white lab coat. And my lawyer will be taking pictures of the entire tableau. Do we understand each other?
PFP: Um... um... YES, ma’am. Is after 5 OK?
Me: Yes, thank you. Have a nice day!
Sunday, October 09, 2005
I have a nickname for him, too.
Check out the Dubya Nicknames Registry, a catalog of monikers the president has bestowed upon his inner circle. So, he really refers to his wife as "Bushie"? Ick.
Azucar, Azucar!
I really like the local college radio station: nothing canned, a real appreciation for roots, and a delicious anticipation of what they'll play next. They were spinning a Celia Cruz song as I was driving to work the other day -- it was brassy, bouncy & bold, and I couldn't help but bop along in the driver's seat. Something about the tune was vaguely familiar, though. I listened a little more closely, and by the time I reached the light, I realized in horror what Cruz was singing: a Spanish cover of "Sugar, Sugar," the Archies' piece o' dreck from 1969. Jeez, I hated that song when it first came out, and I was the audience it was focus-group-tested and laboratory-created for: a cartoon-watching tween. I didn't think that tune could ever be appealing in any way, shape or form. Dang, I hate it when I'm wrong.
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Booklust
I keep telling myself, "Do NOT buy any more books until you finish the waist-high stack in your closet." So what do I do? I buy more books. Just got a box from Amazon last week and I already have a shopping cart of eight more waiting. Of course, if I waited until I plowed through the pile, I'd be heading into the holiday season. Two of the books beg to be savored during cold, rainy November days: Making Time, a biography of Lillian Gilbreth, and The Deep Dark, an account of the Sunshine Mine disaster.
Latest on my recommended list: Candyfreak, by Steve Almond. Oh, my, my! I actually blushed while reading the section on Kit-Kat Darks. This is not a simple journalistic account of America’s regional chocolate treats. This is confectionery erotica, Anais Nin with a sweet tooth and a sense of humor.
Latest on my recommended list: Candyfreak, by Steve Almond. Oh, my, my! I actually blushed while reading the section on Kit-Kat Darks. This is not a simple journalistic account of America’s regional chocolate treats. This is confectionery erotica, Anais Nin with a sweet tooth and a sense of humor.
